Hogg insisted they go to the Lucifer Timms' log restaurant and car wash.
'A decent feed,' he grumbled, 'You get free gloves!'
But it was a filthy place. A loathsome dining experience, with muscular ceiling fixtures brass red and fainting everywhere. Hogg made them pin Disneyland badges to their shirts before they stepped through the restaurant doorway. Brubaker was reluctant.
'Stop your moving about now and put up your hands and just go limp, right now, for a moment. Please.'
Brubaker smiled and his teeth were meat traps and it was all very unedifying.
Then L. Jacques appeared. He went straight for the restaurant doorbell, his right wrist brushing past Hogg's earlobe guard on its way to the bright blue button.
'Here, get off!' was Hogg's suggestion. Jacques pressed the doorbell down and started screaming like a priest.
Hogg was getting visibly steamed up, while Brubaker began rethinking his orthodontist's attitude to life.
Jacques removed his fingertip from the doorbell and turned to a momentary wall painting. It was Kichner's circus picture.
'He isn't always like this listeners. He's sometimes quite decent don't you know it?'
Hogg reacted slowly. 'Talking about me one more time, hey?'
Jacques' smile was really revolting at that moment. It was a couple of broken Porsche cars cartwheeling down a lot of terraces.
Then Timms quarter opened the restaurant door. The knob in his hand was weeping with sweat and his nostrils smoked and rattled above his mouth.
'Ah ha, jerks. You jerks ready for a meal?'
'I don't know chum,' was Hogg's long smelling reply, 'there's a twerp here. Got the attitude of a twerp, have to say.'
Brubaker: 'Do you mean me or Jacques?'
Hogg: 'Jacques, not you.'
Brubaker: 'I try very hard.'
Timms said 'well, yes,' and he opened the door wide. He opened it to the same width as Brubaker's open wide mouth that instant, largely because of the pikelet Brubaker had had earlier that morning, which was now doing dreadful things to his stomach. Unfortunately his meat-draped teeth were also put on show. It was a horrid thing to see, like a couple of car accidents leaking.
It was a horror mouth. The meat hung over the teeth like they were hat racks, and the walls of his mouth were even less attractive looking things, sheer drop offs of bad heart accidents, dexterous muscle and pulsing tubes of iron deficiencies and prozac. The tongue was the most appalling thing in the whole mouth though, that was absolutely the case. A plump wafer of scarred corners, it felt eerie. Only some sort of tropical bird perching on it might have distracted from its overall wretchedness, and then only to some sort of drunk media monitor on a backwards mission to a telephone box.
With the door suddenly open wide Jacques saw a chance to humiliate Hogg for all time. He dragged his wrist back to his left hip pocket. He bit his lip. He yelled out 'life!' and pushed his body forward.
His body seemed to almost roar. It certainly wept idly, a cramped eye socket of weak vision. A sudden jamb of indelicate leftwards behavior, it moved Timms to make one crucial statement before things really erupted.
'Life?' said Timms recklessly, 'this ain't even some long sleep deprivation, guy.'
Then, as expected, things really erupted. In hefts.
Hogg insisted they go to the Lucifer Timms' log restaurant and car wash.
The Fringe is open to submissions of poetry, flash fiction and short stories of any genre. Stories accepted will be published online in our Ezine and also in the monthly pdf magazine.
We are also open to submissions from artists for inclusion in the magazine.
Submissions should be in RTF format or in the body of the email. Send email submissions only to email@example.com
Currently we only offer payment for one story selected as the feature story in the monthly pdf magazine only. The successful author will be contacted to organise payment via paypal for a $5AUD payment. Authors of other accepted stories published on the webzine and in the pdf copy will receive a copy of the pdf version of the mag the story appears in.
We are open to unpublished and previously published stories up to 40,000 words in length.
About The Fringe Magazine
Here at The Fringe Magazine we publish Short Stories, Flash Fiction, Poetry in all genres and reviews of books, roleplay games, music and movies.
Our variety seems to be hiting the mark with over 100,000 views of our Online Magazine with a good spread across all articles.
Our variety seems to be hiting the mark with over 100,000 views of our Online Magazine with a good spread across all articles.?xml:namespace>From surveys we've conducted, our readers are like most people and enjoy reading all kinds of books, both fiction and non-fiction.
With over 350 readers visiting our site each day, we listen to the voice of the masses and try and procure books in all genres to review. To date, we have reviewed over 600 books, including; non-fiction reference, music, art, photography, gardening, cooking, Self Help, architecture, design, biographies and roleplay games.
We also review fiction in all genres; Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Historical Romance, Paranormal Romance, Horror, Crime, Thriller, Comedy, Western. We also publish Author Interviews, Paintings, Sketches, Art Work, Art Work by Susie Wilson, and non-fiction articles. The only thing you won't find at The Fringe Magazine is a bad review, if we don't like something, we won't put up a review at all.
You will also find music and dvd reviews and the occasional interview with musicians and actors.
- BOOK REVIEW: CRAZY ABOUT COOKIES:300 SCRUMPTIOUS R...
- BOOK REVIEW: Fashion Illustrations 1930 to 1970 Ha...
- BOOK REVIEW: Die For Me by Amy Plum
- FICTION: THE MERMAID’S TREASURE by Mary J Webster
- FICTION: Angie By David Perlmutter
- AUTHOR INTERVIEW: Kim Falconer
- BOOK REVIEW: The Dead 2: The Enemy
- BOOK REVIEW: The Dead
- FICTION: The Skin Changer’s Enemy - A Story of the...
- FICTION: The Call - Part 3 By MJ Wesolowski
- FICTION: Threshold by Steve Toase
- FICTION: Brittney the Ugly Protestant by Steven Ba...
- POETRY: Schoolhouse by George Moore
- POETRY: Blue Highway Blues by George Moore
- POETRY: No Zen Poem by George Moore
- FICTION: GhostGlasses By Shane Ward
- FICTION: She Who Comes With a Guitar By Arthur McM...
- BOOK REVIEW: The Leopard
- BOOK REVIEW: The Worry Solution
- BOOK REVIEW: The Fallen Blade
- BOOK REVIEW: The UFO Diaries
- BOOK REVIEW: The Cypress House
- BOOK REVIEW: The Diviner’s Tale
- BOOK REVIEW: Paradoxical Undressing
- BOOK REVIEW: Get Great Marks for Your Essays, Repo...
- BOOK REVIEW: Interviewing
- BOOK REVIEW: An Awkward Truth
- BOOK REVIEW: Biker Chicks
- FICTION: The Cataline Downfall By Shane Ward
- FICTION: Log Restaurant by Ben Pullar
- AUTHOR INTERVIEW: Michael Duffy
- AUTHOR INTERVIEW: Martin Plowman
- FICTION: SATISFIED by Melaine Ryther
- FICTION: NIGHTY GREGORY M. THOMPSON
- FICTION: The Daniel Baxter Project by Travis Lee
- BOOK REVIEW: Shameless Art
- BOOK REVIEW: Art 20th Century Genre & The Artists ...
- BOOK REVIEW: 200 Cake Mix Creations
- BOOK REVIEW: Mermaids – Magical Guide to the Under...
- BOOK REVIEW: Bob Dylan: Stories Behind The Songs 1...
- BOOK REVIEW: Toile
- BOOK REVIEW: Rustic Elegance
- BOOK REVIEW: Water Paper Paint: Exploring Creativi...
- BOOK REVIEW: Ukiyo-E
- BOOK REVIEW: Prophecy by K M Hume
- BOOK REVIEW: Pretty Little Liars
- BOOK REVIEW: Token of Darkness/Persistence of Memo...
- BOOK REVIEW: Burn Bright by Marianne de Pierres
- BOOK REVIEW: Anita Blake Vampire Hunter 18 - Flirt...
- BOOK REVIEW: Anita Blake Vampire Hunter 17 - Skin ...
- BOOK REVIEW: Anita Blake Vampire Hunter 2 - The La...
- BOOK REVIEW: Anita Blake Vampire Hunter Book 19 - ...
- FICTION: Annie By David Jacobs
- FICTION: TOWN HALL TONIGHT! By David Perlmutter
- FICTION: Grief by Rob Donovan
- FICTION: On the Shards of Broken Glass by David Sc...
- BOOK REVIEW: Awakened – House of Night Book 8
- ▼ February (57)
- ► 2010 (403)
- ► 2009 (214)