Little Lost Josh
By Scott Wilson
Word Count: 695

Once upon a time, there was a young man named Josh. Josh was 30 years old and lived in Toowoomba, Queensland. While walking home from school one day, a purple tiger jumped out from behind a statue and knocked Josh to the ground. But just when he was about to let out a cry for help, Josh realised that the purple tiger was only trying to be friendly, and was actually quite cute. At that moment, Josh decided to keep the purple tiger as a pet, and on the way home, he decided to name his pet purple tiger 'Wendy'.

When Josh and his new pet finally got home, guess who was standing at the front door? That's right; it was Josh's mother, Rose. She was quite surprised to see a purple tiger following Josh into the front garden!

'What on earth is that?' shouted Rose.

'It's a purple tiger,' answered Josh.

'Yes, I can see that, Josh, but whatever is it doing here?' asked Rose.

'It's my new pet!' answered Josh.

'Oh you think so, do you?' said Rose. 'I wouldn't get your hopes up, if I were you. You know how your father is afraid of purple tigers.'

She paused, noticing the disappointment on Josh's face. 'OK - I suppose you can keep it until your father comes home.'

With that, Josh grabbed Wendy by the scruff of the neck and led his new pet into the house - even though he knew his father would probably disapprove.

Once in the house, Josh and Wendy played and played, until Josh's favourite television show, 'Who's Line Is It Anyway', started. At that point, Josh forgot all about Wendy running riot in the house. However, halfway through 'Who's Line Is It Anyway', Josh was suddenly brought back to reality when he heard his father calling 'Josh! Josh! Come into the garage... right now!'

Josh legged it into the garage to see what all the fuss was about. When he entered the garage, there stood his father, Drew, pointing towards the bed.

'Will somebody please explain this?' asked his father.

'I spend all day working hard in the fields digging eggplants and this is how you repay me? With elaborate murals?'

Then, as Josh followed his father's finger to where it was pointing, he saw straight away, what his father was so upset about. The tiger had somehow painted an amazingly colourful mural on the bed.

'I don't even want to know how that got there,' said Drew.

'But you had better get it cleaned up now! And you had better get rid of whatever it is that could have painted such a monstrosity!'

Well, knowing his father to be a lover of fine art, Josh knew there was no point in even asking him whether he could keep Wendy for a pet. Without further ado, Josh set out to find where Wendy was hiding. After a few minutes of looking, Josh discovered Wendy sitting underneath the table that Josh did his making love on.

'Come on, Wendy, it's time to find you a new home. Don't look at me like that - I'm not the one who painted the mural on the bed!' scolded Josh.

'Thanks to you I'll never get to have my own pet tiger.'

With that, Josh led Wendy out of the house and down to the local Naughty But Nice. They had just opened a new pet department and Josh knew the owner would find Wendy a good home. So after saying a fond farewell to Wendy, and thanking the owner of Naughty But Nice, Josh walked home.

He tried to take his mind off his sad loss by eating a whole box of jam doughnuts and four king-size Mars bars, washed down by several large glasses of Irish Breakfast Tea.

But Josh couldn't mope around for long because his father reminded him about the amazing mural which he still hadn't cleaned up! 'Oh well,' thought Josh, philosophically. 'At least there won't be any more murals. I guess I'll just have to make sure that my next pet doesn't harbour an artistic streak.'
The End.